The Canteen Mystery
Definitely not Brahms
Trimming a Eucalypt
Rivers I have known
My new career
Daisy - a love sonnet
...yes, it's in the eye...
Fear of Forests
Cup Day Chat
Winds of Change
Hating the Wind
List of 2008 stories
Cup Day Chat
"Good morning. Can I help you? From the newspaper? What we thought of the race? Which one? Ah, the Tuesday one. Bit of a picnic, wasn't it?
"Well, some of us here at Randy Wick are not at all sure what the fuss is all about. The Tuesday race isn't much different from the others really. We always go out there and run along the best we can. The oats in the bucket's always the same at the end. So what's so special about the three o'clock?
"Anyway, now you're here I'll walk you along to meet the fillies and the nags. This is Freddie. He had Mister Excitable on his back on Tuesday, the guy with the orange and red quarters, the one who always expects to win.
"This here is Shirley."
"Hallo, call me Shirl. Oh yes, I had Tight Knees, him in the candy pink stripes. Lovely boy. I think we went wonderfully well, don't you?"
"G'day, I'm Max. I carried Aggressive Idiot; he's a shocker. Wears all black with the white skull in the front. He just didn't want to stay on so I bucked him off in the end."
"This is Bert. He flew in from Ireland specially for the race."
"Yes, well, Heavy Cursor, as his name suggests, swears all the way round. The black and red stars would have told you that. Not much of a rider really."
"I'm Bobby. Of course if you get Gentle Hands - he wears the soft pastel green with white sleeves - you know you're in for a good ride, but I think he kept us too close to the rails. I need lots of space. How about you?"
"Good day, my man. The race? Well, I don't think the track here's as good as our English ones. And I really have to say that it's a bit unfortunate if you get landed with Bottoms Up in the blue and purple halves although I thought he held up well really. He's a bit heavier than some I've carried."
"And the last one who's still here today is Jill."
"I think I went terrifically well considering I had Weighs Heavy - he wears all scarlet. I would've done better without him."
"Now before you go. They don't seem to realise that as horses we run better without weights on our backs. We're faster on our own and much more cooperative. If we'd been allowed we could easily have arranged between ourselves to all cross the finish line together. We'd all win and we'd all get a prize. Seems obvious to most of us. Actually, at a recent stable meeting we discussed a plan for all of us to stop running half way down the final straight and just WALK the last 100 metres or so. A sort of egalitarian equine equality union thing, y'know. Thanks for coming."